by Eric Daniel
Image by Claudio Henrique Claudio from Pixabay
As pastors, one of our primary responsibilities is communication. Whether we’re delivering sermons, offering spiritual guidance, directing ministry leaders, or running church board meetings, effective communication is at the heart of our role. Our ability to communicate well is a significant expression of God’s love for His church.
In my seminary education, I received a few classes on public speaking, sermon writing, and handling difficult situations. Although, there was a noticeable gap in courses that focused on managing people and navigating diverse personalities. I found myself playing catch up for years, but it is possible to develop the skills necessary for good communication.
I often liken effective communication within the church and ministry teams to the functioning of a car engine. A well-maintained engine can get us reliably and efficiently to our destination, but it requires many parts working closely together. These parts create friction, which, if unchecked, can cause the engine to overheat and eventually break down. Just as oil lubricates, water cools, and the thermostat regulates the engine, pastors need “cooling mechanics” to keep relationships within the ministry functioning smoothly.
Here are some strategies that will help keep your relationships running smoothly:
#1 Assume the best
At the foundation of every positive relationship is the assumption that we all have each other’s best interests at heart. The Bible teaches us to think this way: “Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others” (Phil. 2:4). This mindset is crucial when resolving conflicts. Staff relationships, much like marriages, require the ability to work through conflict. It’s not a matter of “if” conflicts will arise, but “when.” By fostering a culture of ‘Assume the Best,’ you can approach conflicts with the right attitude for resolution.
#2 Keep short accounts
We must be quick to forgive and resolve issues as they arise. Don’t store up offenses; they won’t disappear on their own. Instead, they grow into larger issues. Many people tend to dismiss small problems, thinking they are insignificant. However, this only allows the conflict to fester and escalate. Over time, unresolved issues can cause your feelings to become disproportionate to the original offense. Addressing problems early keeps relationships healthy and prevents resentment from building.
#3 Know your audience
Effective communication strategies always involve being a student of the people you lead. One communication approach will not work for everyone on your team. You need to know your audience. Your team members have different personalities, love languages, and experiences. Emotional intelligence is also key to navigating these differences, helping pastors resolve conflicts, encourage open dialogue, and build stronger, more resilient teams. Finally, active listening is crucial—fully concentrate on what the other person is saying without interrupting or formulating a response in your mind. By genuinely hearing others, we can address concerns more effectively and foster a culture of respect and understanding.
#4 The last 10%
At the conclusion of every resolution process, ask the critical question, “Is that the last 10%?” People often resolve most of what is bothering them but avoid the hardest, final 10%. While it’s easier to work through enough to alleviate immediate tension, leaving that last bit unresolved can allow it to fester and grow over time. It’s better to have one difficult day of complete conflict resolution than to hold on to residual grievances that could resurface later.
In conclusion, communication is more than just a functional task for pastors—it’s a ministry. By implementing these effective communication strategies, we can ensure that our ministry relationships operate smoothly, like a well-oiled engine, enabling us to reach our collective goals and fulfill our mission with grace and efficiency.
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